My riding is who I am and what I do

In my early 20’s I learned to ride and quickly fell in love with long road trips and discovered motorcycle camping. For 3 years, my motorcycle was my only transportation. When I moved to the

PNW in my late 30’s, I was amazed at having so many wonderful places to ride, but I had no dirt experience and the pavement kept running out. When I turned 40, I decided I wasn’t going to to keep turning around, so I bought a dual sport, took a dirt bike class and got my first dirt road under my belt.

Shortly thereafter, I was diagnosed with cancer and had to undergo chemotherapy and surgery. my husband and I naively agreed that at least I wouldn’t miss any prime riding season - Chemotherapy was happening in the fall and surgeries were early spring -so I would be all recovered and ready to hit the road again, making this just a nasty memory, right?

Well that’s not how it played out, recovery brought some severe complications for me and it took years before I could really get back on the bike. But this year - thanks to some great doctoring, things are becoming more under control, and this summer is my first summer back on MY bike doing MY thing. I’ve been practicing some short, easy “strips of dirt” with some friends, hoping to pick up riding where I left off five long years ago.

It was these ‘dirty’ friends of mine who saw a post about the upcoming Green Tour 3 that SheADV was leading this year. Apparently, the green tour is a beginners ADV riding tour for three days for women. You camp and ride under the watchful eye of the SheADV founders, Shalmarie and Stephanie, a couple of women who are experienced at this. There is no charge because its something they do to give back to their community. Such great timing for me as I was ready to reconnect with my riding where I left off, and I happened to be between jobs at the moment. My friend forwarded the email address to me - All I had to do was email saying I was interested! I kept my hopes up and fingers crossed! After some phone calls and email communication with the Shalmarie and Stephanie, I was in!

I thought a lot about this upcoming adventure. I was looking forward to doing this and getting back to riding. In my mind I thought I was just adding a few simple skills to my riding.

Day one
Beatrice (my bike) and I arrived fully packed down for motorcycle camping. I didn’t know what to expect being with a group, and I wasn’t even sure if we were returning into town once we left into the wild blue yonder. I didn’t want to be ‘that guy’ who was unprepared, so I brought everything I thought I might need, including food and water for three full days. I believe I MAY have been just a touch overpacked, but better safe than sorry, right? Everyone gathered together at the meeting point, and we sat in the grass under a tree, introduced ourselves and had a pre-ride meeting. We all shared a bit of our riding experience and history, and then Steph gave us an overview of what to expect on the ride up to the campsite. She reviewed how to handle dirt ruts caused by water run-off, and talked a little bit about group riding expectations such as keeping an eye on the person behind you and stopping at intersections until you know the person behind you sees which direction to go. All valuable stuff to know that I really needed to refresh on! She encouraged us to remember that we did not have to ‘tough-it-out’ if we were feeling overwhelmed or unsafe. She assured us that the instructors had experience on many types of adventure bikes, and if we should run into a stretch of dirt that we found especially challenging, they would be happy to talk us through handling it, or even ride our bike through it for us if we preferred. I was the most inexperienced of the group, and while I didn’t plan to utilize that resource, I found it very reassuring to know that my safety and confidence were being looked out for. Questions were answered as a wrap-up, and then we all mounted up and rode off. While riding towards camp, I saw the pavement turn to dirt and was so excited, thinking “I don’t have to turn around!” I was quite proud of how easily I was handling my very overloaded bike on the flat well-packed gravely surface. In fact, I was mentally patting myself on the back around the time we started uphill...and thats when the rain ruts started snaking down the dirt road and I had to try and navigate that. My eyes got big, my breathing shallow and fast, and I had a steely grip on my bars! The butt-end of my bike felt like it was skipping and hopping all over the place, I’m clinging to my handlebars riding uphill while standing ( a new skill for me) - and this was NOT what my street-rider self was comfortable with... AT ALL! But I was here, and I was going to do this, because I was finally taking back my life from cancer - it was mine and I wasn’t going to let it go! I managed to adjust my focus to remembering what I had learned in that dirt bike class so many years ago. “Relax the grip”, “look where you’re wanting to go”, “gentle throttle input”, “breathe”, “breathe”..... oh, and yeah “breathe normal”! I tried first gear but found I had poor throttle control while trying to hang on, so I tried second gear and was more successful as I’m really good at clutch control. It didn’t take long for my clutch hand to grow tired. Soon my overloaded bike and I got caught in a large rut while struggling uphill and I stalled it, which promptly tipped me over, but not fully since I was deep in the rut, and had large metal saddlebags to hold her up! Shalmarie was behind me, and after making sure both Beatrice and I were unhurt, we picked her up. Shalmarie asked what I’d like to do, and looking up the dirt incline, I decided that now was not the time to “tough it out”, so I pointed to a flat-ish spot not very far up the hill and asked if she could kindly park it there and thats where I would start out from. I seriously considered chucking everything I had brought right into the woods as well, but I didn’t say that out loud! Now mind you, its very hot out, we are fully geared, and I had to walk uphill in my boots to get to Beatrice. Shal had to ride my beast full of junk up that hill, hike back down, and then ride up again. Bless her heart, she just became a hero in my eyes! Hiking half the way up to that ‘not-very-far-spot’ (it was far!) helped me to come solidly to the conclusion that I WILL keep it upright because I don’t have what it takes to walk uphill in motorcycle gear again!!! The rest of the ride to our campsite was fairly uneventful in comparison, but suffice to say, I worked hard for every foot of it, but I did keep the shiny side up!

That first campsite was heaven to my eyes! I got off my bike and tried to act casual but I was SO VERY RELIEVED to be there. We all set off to find our perfect tent space, and my mind started churning. I really was doubting whether I should even be on this trip. Who was I to hold back all these women who seemed to know so much more about how to do this? I think I was rapidly losing sight of the meaning of the name - the “Green Tour” right?

Later as we all nibbled on our various campfire dinners, I shared a little of my apprehension. As I made fun of myself and my bike packed like the Clampets, others followed my lead with a few knowing grins as they all shared some of their own learning moments as well. There were lots of helpful suggestions for tomorrows ride, such as removing the rubber from my footpegs for better grip, and maybe taking off my heavy saddlebags. I received lots of assurances that tomorrow Beatrice would be a whole different ride without the weight she held today.

I still felt like I didn’t belong there, everyone was friendly and welcoming, but secretly I felt like a fraud for being there. I blew through my confidence just trying to get to camp on an overloaded bike with minimal skills. I didn’t share this with the group because the last thing I wanted to hear was placating words that I couldn’t possibly believe under any circumstances. So I made myself useful to the group by bringing out a couple of Jiffy Pop’s to share. I figured if I was holding the group up, I should at least make the evenings more enjoyable.

Nobody told me to do things one single way or that I was doing it all wrong, but when I brought up my concerns and opened the door inviting suggestions, the group shared ideas and allowed me to decide how and what might apply to me. I felt respected as an individual, as no one pressured me to do things a certain way, and they had other ideas I could try if something didn’t work for me. You can’t create a better adult learning environment than that.

We regathered around the fire and reviewed things for the ride tomorrow such as counterweighting and balance, types of terrains, and other riding skills to work on. I went to bed that night with a positive feeling. I was still responsible for riding my own ride of course, but I trusted the guidance and knowledge being shared and I felt SAFE.

Day two
The next morning Beatrice and I began our ride minus the topbox, saddlebags, and probably 75lbs or so of provisions and camping gear. The group was right, my bike was MUCH easier to handle unloaded. Last night I was freely giving away food and goodies and water, determined that when we packed up this campsite to move to the next one, I would be a LOT lighter! Shalmarie continued to ride behind me and I made sure she knew that I wanted to hear any coaching she felt I could use. Not a single hurt feeling here - just tell me everything I can do better! Just about every break she would have a suggestion for me to try, and I would work on that skill until the next break and then we would review how it went. I practiced a lot of peg-weighting to turn the bike gently in a sweeping curve, I focused really hard on counter-weighting when the turns were sharper. I was standing for most of the riding to keep my weight on the footpegs for better balance, but every so often my tired weak legs just needed a break and I would sit down. This is where I saw the biggest difference, as my weight was now perched up higher on the seat and made the bike a little bit harder to work with on the gravel. I understood the concepts, but it was really neat to be able to feel the difference and even play with it a bit. Throughout the day we all talked about different skills such as ‘picking your line’ and choosing your gear / speed. Somewhere during that day’s ride I got more comfortable and relaxed with the way the bike handled on the gravel surface, and so I began to experiment with shifting while standing up. My confidence was growing by leaps and bounds! We ran into amazing vistas, tree lined ‘tunnels’ full of dappled shade, and even a downed tree that we all had to help each bike get under and past. At one point we found an intersection with a decent gravel hill in it, and Stephanie asked us if we were interested in practicing some skills such as stopping and starting on a gravel hill. Everybody agreed, and so commenced an impromptu teaching session where we learned what happens when you don’t make it all the way up a gravel hill, and how to manage that situation. That was some great learning, because the techniques that I personally use on the street for stopping on a hill really doesn’t work so well for me on gravel! I found I rely too heavily on having great traction, so we explored using different combinations of controls for me, and now I’ve got something to work on :) Oh, and of course I had a ‘drop’ and Shalmarie again helped me lift my bike with the monkey lift. She’s now been elevated from hero to saint.

Back at the campsite that evening I reflected on where I mentally was at that moment as compared to yesterday. Today.....I felt great! I was amazed at how well I had done. I had relaxed enough to really try to practice some of the skills I was learning, and I didn’t feel I was holding the group back. I was able to sit around the fire and feel like I belonged. To be honest - I felt like a badazz! (insert crazy giggle here).

You know, sort of like a toddler who suddenly proclaims that The Sky is Blue, and he is so proud that he discovered and shared this fact! Yup, that was me alright - again, just trying to act all calm and cool on the outside though.... So I promptly made myself useful to the group again - I broke out the Jiffy Pop, homemade lavender-honey caramels, and fire-roasted some Brussel sprouts, petite onions, and bacon drizzled with olive oil to share - after all we were packing up in the morning and I needed to unload some more ‘stuff’.

I went to bed with a big ol’ grin.

Day three
Up and at’em, quick breakfast, and then breaking down the campsite, thankfully I had a lot less to pack. My extra water helped douse the fire last night, and extra food was shared or tossed into the fire as an offering to the motorcycle gods in the hopes I would stay upright today.

We rode to our next campsite, and each wandered off into the forest behind our site to find a cozy place to pitch their tent. We all rode our bikes back to our tent sites down a footpath through waving grasses and majestically huge trees. My site was right next to the river which gave me a sense of being all alone out in the wilderness, just me and Beatrice.

Everyone got settled, and then Steph shared the map and went over our plan for the day. It was an amazing day for me, there were lots of wonderful sights and Beatrice and I seemed to have a good thing going on the gravel. At one point I was trying something new with my front brake, and I hit a rock, which caused me to squeeze the brake and down I went with my go pro camera happily filming from my helmet. Guess the food offerings to the motorcycle gods was .... rejected! (But oddly, I Love that footage! I’ve slo-mo’d it more times than I’m willing to count) I think it was a bit disconcerting for the rider behind me to watch this happen as we were riding on a road carved into the side of a hill, but I had plenty of room to fall safely, and heck, I was tired and ready for a break anyway! So once again, Shalmarie coordinated the lift of my bike after first making sure I was unhurt (I was absolutely unhurt - atgatt)

and now she was elevated to - uh - hey, what comes after ‘Saint’ anyway? Everybody has a quick break, and takes in the scenery. Beatrice is good, I’m good, we’re all good, so I hop back on and off we ride to see whats around the next corner. The day continues with epic views, informative rest breaks, pictures, and laughter. When the ride finally returned to the pavement, we stopped in town for a great dinner and phone-charging break. On the way back to camp, Steph stopped at the store so that we could each have a beer to celebrate a great ride that day. That night around the campfire, the last popcorns were passed around and two women added to their skillset and learned to Jiffy Pop over an open campfire. It was the least I could do to ‘make myself useful’.

Last day
The morning began with everyone packing up their camp except for me. I had decided I wanted to stay an extra night so I could reflect on the events and soak up the peacefulness of our site. The group took a short dirt trip on the way to the final destination. Wenatchee Powersports was hosting a barbecue for the group, to celebrate Green Tour 3. We were greeted by Melanie, the owner, and her friendly staff on arrival. It felt a little bit like being a celebrity in my mind. We ate a yummy lunch, and took some group photos and shared contact information. I really felt like I belonged to this group. Each and every one contributed something towards my learning. I was cheered on, my campfire food was shared and enjoyed, my laughter was echoed at my learning events, and most of all, I was respected and treated as one of them. The good-natured humor ran strong in this group - someone was even kind enough to draw an “up” arrow on my windshield, in case I forgot (you know who you are, you rascal!)

It was melancholy to watch everyone say goodbye and mount up. I was just getting my feet under me in the ADV world, and now I had to say goodbye to those who so profoundly impacted my experience.

After lunch and goodbyes, I returned to the campsite that we had all shared. I had the place to myself, and while I usually enjoy this type of riding / camping solitude, I found myself a bit lost, maybe even lonely. I missed the chatter about the day’s events. The mulling over of skills and and shared discoveries. I even had the leftover bottles of beer. I made a quiet little fire and opened an evening beer while I reflected on this amazing adventure.

In my mind I thought I was just adding a few simple skills to my riding... but what I gained was leaps of confidence and a discovery of a whole new type of riding! A new passion, if you will after 20+ years on pavement. I was amazed at my riding - I was far more capable on my bike than I ever would have imagined! I looked over at Beatrice thinking, “I did THIS.... on THAT!” Thoughout this adventure, I confronted a few fears, and pushed a few boundaries, but thats exactly what I was looking for. I didn’t know I would have so much fun and I was able to ride to places I never would have attempted. I reflected back to that initial screening phone call with Shalmarie. She said to bring my sense of adventure and willingness to learn. I did. Shalmarie and Steph saw me before I even saw myself. They didn’t see the torn-up soul that I saw every day in the mirror. They saw my potential, and they pulled it right out of its hiding place and showed me what I could do. I tucked into bed that evening reflecting on how amazing it was to be with this group of drama-free, like-minded women.

The next morning, I packed up, and rode home feeling strong, calm and “in place”. ...I met myself, I met the me I had wanted to be, and it was here all along. I took back my life and made it mine again.

My riding is who I am and what I do.

Later back at home...
I was privileged to get to know Shal and Steph without knowing anything of their reputation. I became curious about their history and decided to look deeper. Now here I am a week later, exploring their Ssquared and SheAdv sites.

OH MY GOSH.

I was sitting with motorcycle royalty, and not only did I not know it, I felt like I belonged! Looking back, I was so humbled. There was no bragging, or ‘look at me’ stuff, their professionalism was unequaled. They had ridden four BDRs together in less than a year, and Shalmarie, went and did a fifth, making a record as well as being a part of the filming for it! They instruct, they share all sorts of resources for Adv riding on their site, and most profoundly they have a blog that shares the positives and the struggles of traveling and riding so many BDR’s back to back.

WOW. Part of me wishes I had researched and known all this beforehand, most of me is glad that I didn’t, because I might have been too intimidated to even go. Instead of being blinded by their reputation and accomplishments, I really got a solid deal to learn from them and ride WITH them. Wow. Their focus was always on the riding we did as a group and individuals, what we learned, how it affected us, and where else we wanted to take our skills. We talked over campfires of what riding does for us, our path here, and obstacles we are working on with our riding. They are truly gifted in the art of focusing on their students needs. Their genuine interest was in making sure the experience was tailored to the group needs and that everyone felt respected for being right where they were in their learning process.

My Results
I’m no longer afraid to pull over to the gravel side of the road when I need to stop. I now have access to whole new riding skill set that I’m getting to explore and play with :)

And it was ok that I was no longer “who I used to be”

My riding is who I am and what I do. This is me.

You might be surprised at what you’re capable of doing. Funny, I’ve said that many times over the years to people who admire that I ride. Now I know what that really means and how it applies to me.
Thanks Shal and Steph!